


Happy Birthday and A Merry Christmas

by awest000000



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Actor!Cas, Alternate Universe - Stripper/Exotic Dancer, Crack, M/M, Sam Being an Asshole, Short, Sorry Not Sorry, Stripper!Dean
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-30
Updated: 2013-11-30
Packaged: 2018-01-03 00:42:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1063627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/awest000000/pseuds/awest000000
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's Christmas time. The strip club, Heaven's Dancing, has a Christmas themed night one week before Christmas. Their main dance/stripper is Dean Winchester. </p><p>Dean always performed last, keeping people at the club until the end. Tonight, he wasn't Dean. He was Santa, and was going to see if someone has been naughty.</p><p>Castiel was drug out of his spacious penthouse apartment by his four brothers. They claimed he needed to get out, especially since it was his birthday. When they pulled up to Heaven's Dancing, he knew immediately that he should have stayed home.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Heaven's Dancing

**Author's Note:**

> Sooo... This is kinda based on A Work in Progress by periodicallyIntrigued. There's a chapter where Dean's a stripper and this was born. So, go read it. It's amazing and I love it!
> 
> **This is rated Mature because, hello, strippers! It might not necessarily /need/ to be labeled Mature, but I'm playing it safe anyway.**

Dean walked up the back alley of the joint and went inside the back door. It was warm and he was greeted by makeup and hair artists along with their performers. Dean hardly put on makeup; his stylist said he didn’t need it, only to stop the lights glaring off his skin.

He entered his dressing room and saw his brother, Sam, sitting in one of the chairs. His stylist, Chuck, was standing there nervously, obviously aware of Dean’s dislike for his brother. Dean flashed him a smile and said, “You can go, Chuck. I’ll be ready in a minute.”

Chuck left gratefully, leaving the brothers alone. “What do you want, Sammy? My show doesn’t start for another hour.” Dean asked, bored. He walked to his mirror where he began to inspect and work on his hair.

“It’s Sam. I just came to see how you were,” Sam replied a bit too innocently.

Dean turned around to face him and said, “Cut the crap. Why are you here?”

Sam flinched and said, “Why won’t you just quit this dumb job and move in with me? I’ve been to your apartment and it’s a rat hole. I have more than enough money and space for you.”

“You know exactly why I won’t move in with you Sam. You helped someone _sue me._ You sued the motherfucking _pants off me_. When you were done with me, I was broke, penniless, and didn’t have a dime to my name. I was _also_ left homeless and jobless. It’s your fault I’m here in the first place, so why would I want to have to depend on you?”

Sam sighed and said to his fuming brother, “Dean, I’m sorry. They didn’t give names and I didn’t realize it was you until the court date when it was too late to back out. I wouldn’t have done it if I knew it was you.”

“So you would have done this to someone else? Leave _them_ broke and homeless without a job? No, Sam, I’m glad you did this to me. Only because it saves someone else from this damn life. So you can take your apology and offer and shove it up your ass. And just so you know, I can’t pay my rent anymore, so I won’t be living in that ‘rat hole apartment.’ I’ll be living in the alley, out back.” Dean whirled around toward the door and stalked out, leaving his brother behind.

Anna, another who worked there, was sitting in a chair with her stylist, Charlie, working on her. They both had red hair, so Charlie knew what looked good with it and how to work it.

Dean settled in a seat next to her and sighed. “What’s wrong, Bean?” Anna asked. When Dean had first said his name, he was eating a bagel, so she misheard him and thought he said Bean, calling him that the rest of the day.

“My son of a bitch brother stopped by and tried to get me to quit and move in with him.”

Anna frowned and said, “I’m assuming you said no, right?”

“Hell yeah I said no. He ruined my life so he should feel guilty about it for the rest of his,” Dean snapped. Anna reached over and grabbed his hand.

“I’m sorry, Dean. I didn’t think you hated it here so much.”

He glanced at her and saw how sad she was. “No, no, no! I don’t hate it here. My brother hates that I work here. He doesn’t like the idea of me working at a strip club when he’s a high and mighty lawyer.”

She cracked a smile and said, “I guess that makes sense. I wouldn’t want my brother working here if I was a lawyer.”

They both laughed, effectively upsetting Charlie who was doing Anna’s hair. “You know, Dean, some of us have work to get done. So, stop making my performer laugh. She has to go on in ten minutes.”

He chuckled and said, “I should go Anna. I need to start getting ready, too.” They were both smiling until they saw Sam being escorted out by a security guard. Dean sobered immediately, which made Anna cringe.

“Dean, it’s okay. He’s just a jerk. If he really loved you, he wouldn’t care what you did for a living.”

He smiled and said, “You’re right. Thanks Anna.” He bent down and pressed a kiss to her cheek. He was smacked on the head by Charlie, which was followed by being yelled at.

Dean chuckled again and said, “Sorry, Charlie. I’ll go.” He walked back to his dressing room, musing his job. Why _did_ he have a job here? He suspected it was only because he was bisexual. It didn’t bother him when both, girls _and_ guys screamed and obsessed over his body.

When he walked in, Chuck immediately pushed him into a chair. “We’ve still got to get you prepped for tonight’s show. It’s the Christmas special tonight. You’ve got to bring the house down.”

“What’s my costume, then? Santa?” he joked.

“Nope. You’re the Grinch,” Chuck deadpanned.

“Are you fucking kidding me?! I’m not going to be the damn Grinch! No one likes him!”

“Dean, you’re overreacting. People love him. Besides, you’re costume is very… form fitting, I guess you could say.”

He threw a dubious look over his shoulder at his stylist. Chuck pulled a covered hanger off a hook and unzipped it, revealing a green morph suit without a head and a Santa coat, hat, and very, very short shorts.

Dean shrugged and said, “Let’s do it, then.”

Chuck had seen Dean naked multiple times, so he undressed right there. Once he was stripped down to just his underwear, Chuck threw him a G-string. He quickly stepped out of his underwear and was just pulling on the other when he door burst open.

Dean spun around to face opposite the door and yelled, “You gotta pay for the show, dude!”

Chuck had thrown a robe over him so no one could see anything. Pamela, the owner of the club, was the one who came in. “Dean! You _have_ to make tonight’s performance perfect. We’re having a group of rather famous individuals come here to watch you perform. They’ll be here any minute.”

“Pfft. I always make my performances perfect.” He finished tying his robe and faced her with a cocky grin on his face. “It’s them you should worry about. I might woo them to the point of collapse. So, how many girls will it be?”

Dean turned to his wardrobe, looking over the outfit that had been chosen. “There won’t be any girls; just five gentlemen here for a birthday.” Dean choked on his breath and started hacking up a lung.

“There’s only going to be five dudes here to watch me? That’s it?” Dean gasped.

Pamela rolled her eyes and said, “They didn’t want to make it a big deal, so they said not to clear the building on their account. You’ll still have your regular group of cheering women there.” She turned to Chuck and said, “Plans changed. We’re not doing the Grinch. Just make him a very sexy Santa.”

Chuck frowned; he had been excited for the Grinch. Dean asked, “Am I getting a script or am I winging it?” Usually if there’s an important person or it’s a holiday, they used scripts. Tonight, it would be both.

She pulled out a paper and handed it to him. “It’s not very hard. You’re mainly just dancing like usual. You have a few speaking parts, but you won’t forget because a microphone will come down.”

Dean skimmed it. She was right; it seemed easy enough. Sit, dance, talk, then dance some more. Simple. “Alright, let’s do it. C’mon Chuck let’s get me all prettied up.”

Pamela left, allowing Dean to finish getting ready. They scrapped the green morph suit and just stuck with the Santa outfit. When he was ready, there was only five minutes before the show started. Anna’s show had just ended, and she walked in looking satisfied. Her bra and panties, which were red with white fur, were full of ones, fives, and a few tens.

“Beat that, Santa.” She winked before walking into her dressing room with Charlie following her.

Dean just smirked. _Oh, I will,_ he thought. The lights on stage shut off and the crew members wheeled a huge throne out on the stage. The club used it for various things, but it would be the first time Dean’s used it. He followed them and sat down, getting ready for it to begin.


	2. Show Time

Castiel was sitting cross legged on the couch reading the script he had just got the day before. It was his birthday, and only a week before Christmas. He usually got his presents on Christmas instead, because he hated celebrating his birthday.

There was a knock on his door. He got up and answered it, revealing his four brothers. “Oh no,” Cas moaned.

“Oh yeeesss!” his older brother, Lucifer, sang.

Gabriel grinned and threw an arm over Cas’s shoulder. “Tonight, Cassie, we’re going out. It’s your twenty-ninth birthday. Next year, you’ll be old and thirty.”

Michael then stepped forward and said, “You’ll never guess where we’re going, either.”

Cas groaned and said, “Where are we going?”

“It’s a little place called Heaven’s Dancing. Heard of it?” Raphael smirked.

“Wait, _what?_ You’re bringing me to a _strip club?!_ ” Cas shouted.

The old lady down the hall poked her head out the door and gave them a disapproving frown. Cas waved sheepishly before ushering his brothers in and closing the door.

“You’re overreacting. It starts in an hour, so we need to go to get good seats. I heard he’s the best they’ve got!” Lucifer stated.

Gabriel pushed Castiel out the door and they all piled into the van. Castiel grumbled the whole way there. The outside of the club was nice. It was a reddish brown brick and had a canopy above the door. They pulled up to the V.I.P. parking and Raphael handed his keys over.

“You ready for the night of your life, Cassie?” Michael asked.

“Not in the slightest,” returned the youngest.

They all simply laughed as they asserted themselves to the front of the line. The security guard stopped them.

“Where do you think you’re going? Get in line!”

“I do believe we have a reservation. Perhaps you’ve heard of ‘Novak.’” Lucifer calmly replied.

The man grabbed his radio and said, “Is there a reservation for Novak?” The line buzzed and a reply affirmed it. He simply shrugged and let them pass, saying, “My apologies.”

Gabriel led them to a booth near the front of the stage that had a reserved sign and their name on it. A red headed woman was on stage, twirling around a pole. Michael whistled and got closer, with Raphael and Lucifer following him.

Cas’s face was burning and he obviously didn’t want to be here. “Gabriel, why did you bring me here?”

“Cas, you need to lighten up. It’ll only be like thirty minutes. Then, you can go home and be a recluse until the holiday seasons over and you go back to work. Is that so much to ask?” Gabriel sounded exasperated.

He nodded, feeling guilty for upsetting his brother. The woman’s show ended a few minutes later. The lights shut off and it was impossible to see. The other three brothers managed to stumble back into the booth. Something was brought on stage along with some people walking.

When it was completely quiet, an announcer’s voice boomed, “Ladies and gentlemen. This is what you all’ve been waiting for. The one and only: Dean Winchester!”

Smoke from a fog machine started rolling out. Some lights behind the stage came on, just so you could see someone sitting on a throne with his head tilted down and to the side rather seductively.

Blue Christmas by Elvis Presley started playing. An incredibly deep voice sang the beginning words, “I- I’ll have a _blue…_ ”

Lights burst on and you could see the man on the throne rise. He was tall, wearing a Santa coat, short shorts, and a Santa hat. His boots went to his knees and you could see nearly all of his toned, muscular thighs.

He placed the microphone on the cord that hung down from the ceiling and let it rise up. The man expertly rolled his hips, earning him a wild cheer from the crowd. Cas’s mouth went dry and his eyes widened. His mouth unconsciously dropped.

The man on stage let the coat drop down his arms. He pulled it off and threw it to the side, causing the crowd to go insane. He flicked the ball on the Santa hat to the side, which was actually very erotic. Once the song ended, another played (Wizards in Winter by the Trans-Siberian Orchestra) quietly in the background.

The microphone lowered again and he took it. “I’ve heard it’s someone’s birthday. Is there a Mr. Novak here in the audience? Could you come on up?”

Gabriel nudged him and pushed Cas out of the booth. Cas stumbled toward the stage. A security guard helped him up and brought him over.

“Hello, Mr. Novak. It’s your birthday, correct? A little elf came and told me.” Dean smiled suggestively.

Castiel nodded. Dean took his wrist and brought him over to the throne. He sat down with the birthday boy on his lap. “It’s almost Christmas. Have you been a good boy?” There was a pause before he said, “Or have you been _naughty_?” The crowd burst with cheers. Dean got closer to his ear and held the microphone away. “Dude, this is in my script. If you want me to stop at any time, just squeeze my wrist three times. I’ll wrap it up real quick and let you go back to your seat.”

For a minute, Dean sounded normal to Cas. He was just another human there, not the man trying to seduce him. Cas nodded and whispered, “Thank you.”

He smirked and went on with the show. “So, Mr. Novak, what do you want for Christmas? A new _toy_ , perhaps?”

The crowd could hardly contain themselves. Dean went on, making several sex jokes. He was about to say dildo, when Cas squeezed his wrist three times. “Do you want a dil-.” Three squeezes to his wrist later, “-ate. Hm? Do you want a date? I’m sure I could set you up. Hell, you can go on a date with me, big boy.” Dean leaned in to his ear and whispered, “I’m really sorry. I’ll wrap it up and let you go.”

Castiel stood up and nearly fell. His knees were still weak from all of Dean’s dirty talking. He was caught by a pair of large, warm hands. He looked up and saw Dean’s concerned face. Cas shook his head and said, “I’m fine.”

Dean helped him up and kept an arm around his waist, even sliding two fingers in the waistband of Cas’s slacks. The crowd was ecstatic at that. The security guards kept the audience held back as Dean helped Cas to his seat. When he sat down, Dean winked and said, “Thank you for coming to Heaven’s Dancing. _Please,_ do come again.”

Dean gave him a genuine smile, not the fake plastic one he’s had on all night. Cas smiled in return. The stripper turned away and headed back to the stage. Run, Run Rudolf by Lynard Skynard started blasting. When he got back on stage, he continued his dancing. He slipped off one side of his suspenders, letting it drop at his side. The other soon followed, making everyone scream.

There were three buttons one his shorts. He fingered one of them before popping it open. By the time all three were undone, Cas could hardly hear. Dean shimmied out of the shorts, revealing a red G-string. Cas’s pupils dilated and his cock hardened. Dean danced around, swaying his hips smoothly to the music. How he did it was beyond Cas. No one should be allowed to move that good. It should be illegal, although he was glad it wasn’t.

Dean kneeled in front of the crowd, rocking his hips side to side. One woman’s hand was moving toward his crotch, so Dean bucked towards her. Her hand grazed his cock and she screamed and tried to grab it again. Several people were trying to stuff ones and fives into the straps. Dean grabbed a ten and slowly slid it down his chest and into the sack of his G-string.

The owner of the bill nearly fainted. He smirked and turned around, still on his knees. When his back as to the audience, everyone got a good look of how perfect his ass was. It shook and moved to the music. People pressed more bills to him. He easily earned more than Anna.

As the song was ending, Dean got onto the balls of his feet. Keeping his hips thrust out, he rose slowly, giving everyone something to marvel at. Once he was back on his feet, he walked back to the throne. He rolled and bucked his hips seductively again before sitting down. He sat against one of the arm rests, throwing his feet over the other and spreading his legs. One fell off and landed on the floor, allowing everyone to get a good look at his body once more. As the final notes of the song ended,all the lights turned off, leaving everyone in darkness.

Cas was amazed. Never had he expected it to turn out like this. Lucifer and Gabriel walked over to him with mischievous smiles on their faces. “What did you do?”

“Oh, nothing,” Lucifer said.

“We just booked you a private session with Dean Winchester is all,” Gabriel finished.

“What?!” Cas exclaimed.

A woman dark hair came up to them. “Hello, Mr. Novak. I’m Pamela Barnes. I own this club. If you’ll follow me, you’re private session will begin shortly.”

Cas followed the woman, glowering at his brothers the whole way.


End file.
